Sunday was Mother’s Day, and I had no expectations. My husband and I have been arguing, money has been tight, and the schedule has been packed. I felt that there was no point in getting my hopes up that “it would be my day.” Being that my kid isn’t even two, I doubted I’d even get so much recognition as a macaroni necklace.
Mother’s Day is hard for all moms. It sucks to have people tell you that it’s all about you, when really, as soon as they say “Happy Mother’s Day” and throw their last-minute, everything-else-was-sold-out gift at you, they’re off the hook and it’s back to the same grind that you do every freaking day. It’s especially hard when your own mom isn’t around anymore. For the last nine years, Mother’s Day has been more about what I didn’t have than what I did.
We now have half a kitchen (renovations are mostly complete but we ran out of money for appliances) so we decided to invite a couple of friends over to celebrate the day with us, and that was hands down the best thing that we could have done. Ladies, your mom tribe is everything. We spent the day laughing and drinking sangria, and ate a fabulous homemade brunch. It was the first time I felt like I had anything to celebrate.
I’m writing this to say: if your Mother’s Day sucked, that’s okay. It’s not fair, and I wish it wasn’t the case, but it’s okay. Most of this whole motherhood thing sucks, and even on Mother’s Day, we’ve still gotta be on call. But try to find a moment of celebration anywhere, where you are happy to be alive and trudging through this amazing, exhausting journey with amazing, exhausted women who get it. And be thankful it’s on a Sunday and day-drinking is totally okay.
I love you and you’re doing great.
((The spa deals are still going until the end of May)).
Part of raising a family is embracing the mess of daily life. I love kids, but I don’t love that part of motherhood quite so much. I tend to be a bit of a germophobe, so I catch myself going through a lot of paper towels. But so many of the things in life that are fun are a little (or a lot!) messy—first foods, first art projects and first birthdays! So, Phoenix and I headed to Manhattan to celebrate her first birthday party with Bounty and mother and author Kristin Cavallari, where I knew they’d have my back when it came time for clean-up. Continue reading →
On September 10th, my tiny baby turned one year old, and quite frankly, I’m still in shock. Because she’s not walking yet, I’ve been in denial, but the truth is plain to see—I no longer have a newborn, an infant, or a baby. I am the parent of a toddler.
I was never really around younger kids growing up (I’m the youngest of my whole family) so I had no idea what in the world to plan for her birthday party, let alone how to answer the well-meaning but totally stupefying question of “what does she want?” The only thing that she is truly, truly passionate about is food and empty water bottles. I figured I should probably just ask around to find out “What’s the best gift you can give a one-year-old, and why?” Continue reading →
My mother wasn’t a very sappy woman, but she loved to create heirlooms and save memories. Now that I have my own little one, and my mother has passed away, I find myself wanting to hold on to every little moment and every little thing as well, because I know how infinitely valuable those relics will be years from now.
About two years ago, when I was going through a box of things from my mom’s old apartment, I came across a letter that she had written to me when I was in high school. “Life is short,” she said. I know my high-school self had dismissed the sentiment, but my hands shook as I read it and cried. Continue reading →